Art for art's sake

While I don't often hang around art galleries mulling over the surreal juxtaposition of opposing colours and piecing together the elements to come up with a well-informed critique, I do have some opinions when it comes to art. Like when you paint a portrait of Kate Moss, you should at least consult a swatch book and get the hair colour right. As for the part about only sleeping with Jesus, if I remember my celebrity gossip correctly, I think she also dated a whole bunch of apostles and had a baby with one of them. And likening Pete Doherty to Jesus.....I think only Whitney Houston has been in and out of rehab more times than the son of God has.



But art is like that. It makes artists think of crazy things in the name of their passion. Take the great French impressionist Renoir for example - crippled by arthritis in his later years, he had to paint with his paintbrush strapped to his wrist. If only Renoir had found about butt printing techniques. It would have been less painful for him and today's generation of museumgoers would be wowed by Renoir's "Flowers from my ass".

I'm sure there are many of you out there with artistic behinds. Just slip and slide around the canvas and see what price your efforts fetch. Ladies will be pleased to know that they have been gifted with an extra artistic tool. Push the envelope with your, uh, envelope. If you're worried that your equipment isn't up to standard, there are places for this sort of thing.