You Like, You Buy Vol 42

Oh how times have changed since Marco Polo returned from the mystical Orient laden with chests of Great Wall souvenirs and a fantastic fried rice receipe. Now it is China's turn to import European style and sensibilities by acquiring licenses with classic fashion brands. One such example is Montagut (www.montagutmode.com), which is touted by its website, as "a French successful story".

Indeed the number of little red flags it has amassed across the mainland resembles like the screenshot of some turn-based strategy game. Besides showing us its extensive range of fashion, Montagut's ad campaign is also an educational tool for the Chinese. It provides us with a valuable insight into the surly, foul-tempered malcontent that is the French stereotype.


Most of the male labour force goes to work on BMW bikes which can only mean a whole lot of unfashionably mussed hairdos in the mornings. I cannot think of a worse way to start the day.


On a social level, they're not terribly fun to be around either because of their tendency to blend into the background like small woodland creatures which means that somebody inevitably ends up getting shot or run over.


The male malaise extends to love and relationships. Damn these frigid Gallic maidens and their reluctance to get their freak on underneath a makeshift treehouse.


There are several things for a man in this position to be disgruntled about. He has Rosie O'Donnell hair, plus he's decked out like a human traffic safety system. At least his date is oblivious to his shortcomings, thanks to the wonders of a thick blunt fringe.


It seems like the only happy couples in France are the circus folk but good luck with trying to remove those in a hurry. They appear to be quite content with admiring each other's gender neutral bodies for the time being anyway.


Finally, you'll be glad to learn that letting your children play unsupervised with chandeliers doesn't always result in electrocution. Don't rule out mild shock though.