Friday, March 17

The many faces of Anna

If I could tackle Anna Wintour to the ground and shove this magical fortune cookie I prepared down her throat, then we could exchange bodies for one freaky Friday. There are many lavish perks and benefits to be gained by assuming her identity. However all the couture in the world still couldn't stack up to the best part about being Anna - having access to her full range of facial expressions. Once you've got these down pat, you're pretty much set for life.

Unabashed maternal pride and love

Tacit acknowledgment that this particular dead animal is doing a somewhat competent job in keeping her warm and stylish

Feigned wide-eyed innocence upon being accused of not liking fat people

Withering scorn for fat people

Fearsome invincibility despite being riddled with bullet holes

Anxiety over forgetting to record the finale of Project Runway

Embarrassed consternation at being photographed with someone from Teen People magazine

Childish glee at witnessing the wonders of botox up close

Utter loathing and deep disgust at having to sit next to a more powerful female


At 1:15 AM, Blogger sfmike said...

Thank you for the Freaky Friday education on Ms. Anna. For some reason, I have always gotten her pictures mixed up with the ever-thin author Joan Didion. "Slouching Towards Vogue" is a blog entry that demands to be written.

At 9:49 AM, Blogger Blandwagon said...

Fearsome invincibility despite being riddled with bullet holes

I like the idea of an Anna Wintour Superhero. Although I'm not sure we could trust her to only use her powers for good.

Actually, I'm guessing it would be evil all the way. Oh well.

At 3:46 PM, Blogger Burnt Karma said...

Another spot-on blog post.
I always thought the character of Lilith from Frasier/Cheers was based on Anna Wintour.

At 12:35 AM, Blogger The Scarlett said...

Whenever I see a woman wearing an unfortunate fringe, I always blame the Wintour entity.

At 2:38 AM, Blogger Bill Scott, Sr. said...

This is soooooo funny....thanks for posting about Anna.

At 8:49 PM, Blogger scout said...

what makes it so crazily funny is that it is probably true.


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