Monday, February 6

You Like, You Buy Vol 40

Oh I don't shop at chain stores...I prefer to pick up original pieces that I find at quirky little boutiques favoured by those in the know...
If someone said this to me, I would automatically assume (right after rolling my eyes so far back my eyeballs would smack with an audible thump against the back of my head) that they spent their weekends picking the racks clean at Miniztore (

Upon first impression Miniztore sounds very exclusive. It is located outside of a shopping mall and assures us that "We're selling Japan/Europe Fashion. They are all have limited amount." And I can certainly see why.

As a novelty tote bag, it's actually almost endearing apart from the tails which were a real dealbreaker for me. You've got the thin cat who's too ashamed to show its face and the fat cat who's putting up its arms in mock surrender. Okay you're right, I find this as bewildering as you and yes I do seem to have an iPod mini attached to my chest.

But the clothes...sweet lord the clothes...I swear to god cross my heart that I have never seen anything like that anywhere else on earth. Are we to believe that these came from either Japan or Europe? If so, the situation over there is more dire than I imagined.

What a visual melee this coat is. It represents the burst and bleeding retinas of each person who has ever laid eyes on it.

Perhaps this would be more suited to you - you being the magician-clown who is required to gesture "Voila", then suavely pull out fancy bits of linked fabric out of your sleeves except that those bits are actually your sleeves and they don't budge no matter how hard you tug and tug. Well at least you can take the jacket off when you're indoors and conveniently forget it, unlike a skirt (please, I don't go to the same sort of parties as you lot do).

Who could have done this to a skirt other than a creatively frustrated child wearing a blindfold? Granted, the multi-coloured pleats seem to form some kind of logical pattern but there's something so incongruous happening with the lace I can only postulate that's some Brownian motion happening there.

Unless this is your family crest, you have no business wearing it emblazoned on your skirt. Even then it belongs on a shield proudly displayed in the den beside hunting trophies and pictures of big boats.

Frankly the stitching on this blouse frightens me. If Jocelyn Wildenstein was a blouse, this is what she would look like.

That is way too many colours to be used on one top. That is also way too many condoms to be used on a normal item of clothing. It must be an orgy top, one that is worn when filming "Basic Instinct 2". Ms Stone, if you don't put this on, we won't be able to get an R rating.

Another blog to visit: OrdinaryGweilo - Everyday Life in Hong Kong from the perspective of a Brit living in the New Territories. It's not big and it's not clever, but we don't care.


At 1:41 PM, Anonymous marshmallow said...

i could be used to stop traffic (in the sense of replacing the red light)

At 4:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oops,what is wrong with my fashion sense? I think that with the exception of the first outfit, the others look pretty good. They wouldn't be out of place in Japan.


At 2:05 PM, Anonymous Aussie said...

Ordinary Gweilo is what got me here in the first place... hehehe :D

At 12:38 AM, Anonymous La BellaDonna said...

Please stop. You have no consideration. Some of us are trying to read this as we work, and it's just not good if we get caught laughing out loud at our desks, OK? Thank you. I sounded as if I was trying to retch up a chicken as I tried to muffle the cackles with my hand.

I don't know why this one hit so hard, when I love all your posts; maybe it's because I'm so used to trying to produce actual wearable garments when I sew.

Funniest. Post. Ever.


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