State of the Fashion Union

I sense many deep-seated concerns over at the State of the Fashion Union blogging carnival. Not so sound overly complacent, but I'd like to reassure everyone that everything in this part of the world is just fine and dandy. We are largely united in our preference for European brands over local brands and sparkly jeans with bits of lace hanging of them like the last stubborn vestiges toilet paper clinging to its cardboard roll. We are also pleased to have the opportunity to look at the fashion mistakes made by our our cousins in West and replicate them in an ever more dramatic way.

Just because bad fashion isn't visually friendly doesn't mean one should downplay its significance. Indeed I owe a great deal to it. Were it not for my dad's ultra-groovy paisley-patterned flares catching my mum's eye across the packed disco floor, I would not be here today. It also helps me remember my colleagues' names - Anne, mother of three, is the one who owns a few too many crushed velour baby doll dresses while Deborah is perpetually jaundiced due to her yellow eyeshadow and blonde highlights.

Usually the people who dress badly have paid dearly for the privilege to do so, thus providing you with another injustice to rail against - that of people who have all this money but don't know what to do with it. Instead of walking into the first nice boutique they come across, like Julia Roberts does in "Pretty Woman", they make a wrong turn and end up at somewhere like Versace.

The prevalence of bad fashion also offers up an explanation for the sorry state of global affairs. If so many people's thought processes are incapable of putting together a simple outfit that does not involve the colours green and purple, then how can we hope to cure the many ills that plague the world today. We might as well let children run the world.

No matter what season, bad fashion will continue to happen around you or to you, if you dress like you're trying to upstage Bjork. As long as there exist "designers" with a rock music/thespian/trust fund background and "actresses" who have more stylists than acting credits, it will also strike the red carpet and the runway with awesome ferocity.

This blog salutes the people who make atrocious fashion knowing that people will buy it, the people who buy it and most importantly the people who decide to wear it outdoors. Whether or not you like it, we are all in this together.