Monday, March 21

Can you feel the love tonight?

Feeling a little depressed by the recent spate of celebrity break-ups? The Chinese media is here to show us that romance is still alive and well in the animal kingdom. Their "mating season for leopards" pictorial guides us through the 4 stages of a one night stand at the zoo:
1. Have I seen you somewhere or met you before because those spots sure do look familiar.
2. What shags like a wild panther and winks *wink*
3. Of course I'll respect you in the morning.
4. And to think, I didn't even have to buy you dinner! Now be quiet and go to sleep.

Chinese people have believed for a long time that jungle cats make better, more considerate lovers. Hence the need for old rich men to stock up tiger genitalia as an aphrodisiac. Come on, you geezers, as if your vacuous mistresses even notice! They're lying back and thinking of how soon they'll get a call to pick up the latest "it" handbag they reserved at the Dior trunkshow. Being waitlisted is quite infuriating sometimes.

The Chinese newspapers continue to perpetuate this belief with stories like the one above. They would also have us believe that even Jennifer Aniston temporarily hooked up with a tiger. Yeah, that'll show Brad.


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