Friday, August 27

Salute the Hirsute

With all the internet sites devoted to hairy guys, you'd think that the fashion world would declare hirsute as the new black. But alas, it's all about the hairless male models and even movie Wolverine had to undergo some backhair waxing. Fear not because I have found several sites that will accommodate your hairy fetishes.



In recent weeks, there has been quite a bit of publicity surrounding a very hairy guy in China called Hairy Child (Maohai). He's had some celebrity success in China and even has an official website but I think his career would really take off if they got him to star in a new Monkey Magic tv series. I felt really bad when I read about all his health problems stemming from his condition. But then I cheered up slightly when I found out that he has a girlfriend and that his palms aren't hairy. In this respect Maohai is doing better than totally hairless Tom "I love women" Cruise who recently decided to show the world how lonely he was in a Rolling Stone pictorial. For some other Asian men however, growing a simple mustache is such a challenge that they need to start up their own 2004 Asian Mustache Olympics (start from the bottom and scroll up).



When God created man, he thought it would fun if some of them got an extra helping of backhair. Those who have received this special gift deal with it in different ways - some show it off by wearing tank tops while others see it as a furry albatross on their back that needs to be sheared regularly. If this sort of thing turns you on, cough*freak*cough, you'll enjoy visiting Hairyback.com



Monobrows tend to be regarded unfavourably because they are associated with a lack of trustworthiness and a general inability to evolve properly. Nevertheless, Monobrow.com is the place where mono bros celebrate the unity of their eyebrows.



As this is an equal opportunity blog, I've decided to give a shoutout to the follically-challenged as well. When your hairline starts receding faster than guests leaving a Chinese wedding once dessert has been served, you're going to have to make some tough decisions. Do you embrace the baldness or ingeniously wrap the remaining strands of hair around your head. As Combover.com shows, this sort of thing is an acquired skill that money can't buy. Even a rich man needs to start off as an apprentice in the craft of the combover.



While most women (and I use this term loosely) have different body and facial hair concerns from men, hair removal is an important part of the beauty routine. Good crotch topiarists are often booked out for weeks in advance, whether it's for a simple bikini wax or for a Brazilian which involves tidying up the whole basement. The whole process is about as enjoyable as getting the rug pulled out from under you but plenty of women continue to subject themselves to the pain. Why? Because it stops self-appointed crotch researchers from trying to decipher their personality type.

8 Comments:

At 8:35 PM, Blogger Darp said...

My goodness.

You have left no follicle stone unturned in this expose of yours.

I am insanely jealous that you discovered Asian Moustache Olympics before I did.

I just have to link it.

Re: Monkey Magic.

Do you prefer the original Pigsy or the later, more Hangook looking one?

Original Pigsy had better sideburns

 
At 11:09 AM, Blogger lily lover said...

OMG! Those Asian Moustache Olympics are hilarious! Some of those links are so very scary.

 
At 2:16 PM, Blogger lily lover said...

This article reminded me of your blog!

 
At 1:22 PM, Blogger j-a said...

that japanese guy is a twerp who needs to be shot. just friggin' unbelievable.

 
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