Dressing with attitude

Sometimes dressing with attitude is the only way to be taken seriously. Wasn't that how Sandra Dee finally got her man at the end of Grease, by pouring her new improved big-haired badass self into tight black leather?

Tattoos

What with all the regular appointments for hairdos, manicures, pedicures, facials and massages, there's never enough free time to book in a relaxing hour under the tattoo gun. Deciding on a tattoo design is also extremely vexing for the commitment phobic because our bodies are not like etch-a-sketches which we can just turn upside down, shake a little bit and start all over again. In these respects, Sleeves Original Tattoo'd Clothing cater for the busy person who has a tendency to experience tattoo remorse. The shirts create the illusion of rough-hewn tattooed arms that would gladly partake in a barroom brawl.

The tattoo designs are a lot more thoughtful than the half-baked declarations of undying love to an ex-lover that has be lasered away or transformed into an unintelligible phrase like Wino Forever when the relationship ends after a week. Sleeves Clothing has also been endorsed by an Olympic figure skater. You might not immediately associate sportspeople who perform dainty triple lutzes while wearing crushed velour sequinned chiffon outfits with toughness but need I remind you of Tonya Harding.

Balls

How many times have you been bullied for being a timid, shrinking wallflower? If only you had one tenth of what Bea Arthur has, you wouldn't be sobbing in the refuge of a bathroom stall. And now you can, with Ballsies and their patented swinging action that boosts confidence and develops thick-skinnedness. However if the designers had any cojones they would have made the Ballsies to human instead of mouse scale and as a belt to sling around the waist. Be sure to check out the Ballsies poetry which is more oestrogen-and-red-wine rather than testosterone-fuelled.