Friday, January 7

Personal Hygiene

Personal hygiene. Let's try make it a social norm instead of an option. Brush, gargle and spit. Rinse, lather and repeat (several times if you have OCD). A change of underwear daily. If they've been ripped apart by wild dogs then make a pair out of an old t-shirt. And ladies, when guys say they like dirty girls, they usually mean the other sort of dirty. I know, shocking isn't it.

You'd be surprised how many people don't include personal hygiene in their daily routine. Take Colin Farrell for example. He might be the world's most famous leprechaun right now, but I'm worried I might catch something if I stare at his picture for too long. Colin needs a decontamination-strength cleansing stat. Who knows, there may be some people who still find him attractive enough to volunteer for that job.

It's been a while since we had a product blitz, so here are some things to keep you stylishly sanitary:

Italian toothpaste
Marvis toothpaste is imported from Italy. Therefore it is fashionable by default. It comes in gelato-coloured flavours like Aquatic Mint, Paradise Mint, Ginger Mint and Jasmine Mint. Good enough to eat, apart from the bit about sodium flouride being poisonous when ingested.

Perfume and deodorant
I always get flustered when people come up and ask: Excuse me, can you tell me the time and help mask my body odour? That's why the Venexx Perfume Watch is a godsend. Be punctual and fragrant. Or be late and fragrant. Either way I don't care, as long as you took the time to smell nice. Deodorant might be more your thing in which case you need to first understand the subtleties of a French deodorant ad.

Portable Bidet
The discussion had to get intimate at some point. The TOTO Travel Washlet comes in pink and blue. There are a ton of these on the market so don't be taken in so quickly by the pretty colours. Shop around and most importantly, make sure that they have a no-returns policy. Read the testimonials and if you find, like Dr Allan Cohen, that your friend wants to borrow it, it's time to get a new friend.

What's your favourite personal hygiene product?

Blogs of the day: Watchdog of the Wankers and The Falimako Blog are nominated as Best South Australian Blogs in the 2005 Australian Blog Awards.


At 4:04 AM, Blogger Bryanboy said...

OMG. I love Marv!!! And Botot!!!

At 10:16 AM, Blogger surtr said...

did you perhaps mean 'sodium fluoride'?

yes, I'm a pedanic geek, and we all know what -that- means. punishment!

I'll warm up my Bally nipple clamps.

At 12:02 PM, Blogger Spirit Fingers said...

Yep, I meant that, corrected it now and a broken link, sloppy sloppy me. Have fun with your clamps surtr - make sure you put on the Divinyls song "Pleasure and Pain".

At 4:22 PM, Blogger Elks said...

That picture of Colin Farrel makes me twitch (and not in a good way). It also makes me want to tie him down and run over him with a razor. Is it just me, or does he look like he has an obscene hair to skin ratio? Hulllooooooo mr missing link!

At 6:46 PM, Blogger Greg said...

ahaha your shits damn funny to me. I see you're from Hong Kong, are you British, Chinese, or Punjab? I just got back from Hong Kong and those are the only 3 nationalities i really saw there. Just an observation...

My favorite hygiene product is my preparation H. Okay, so maybe its not like toothpaste or cologne, as in it don't make me any prettier, but damn... It hits the spot.

At 12:54 PM, Blogger Mallrat said...

When do they dstart putting out Marvis toothpaste in chocpolate or honeycomb?

and since when was an Italian brand called Marvis?

At 11:41 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hi! would you know where i could buy portable bidet in hong kong?

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