Thursday, May 12

Skimpy heroics

While Hong Kong languishes in some kind of year-round non-ratings tv hell, our neighbours across the South China Sea sit in the thrall of DARNA. As champion warrior of people who would normally qualify for benefits under a generous social welfare state, Darna has been wowing audiences with her skimpy heroics.



It is no surprise that the costume is a real ratings-grabber. Compared to DC Comics' Wonder Woman, Darna offers double the action with only half the clothing. There is much to be dazzled by - the golden egg being laid in the middle of her forehead, the Janet Jackson inspired sunburst shield and short shorts that show no mercy to celllulite. But the true extent of Darna's powers are revealed by the infinite supply of tissue paper emanating from her crotch:
Darna Woman, Darna Woman.
All the world's waiting for you,
and the 2-ply you possess


The fascination with sexy red super heroine outfits is not a new one. You may recall how Elektra managed to scrape US$14 million in its opening weekend by putting Jennifer Garner in a Victoria's Secret Body By Victoria body shaping bustier and naughty bed ties.



Just how long has this sexualisation of super-hero outfits been going on? To answer that question we have to go back a long long way, some thirty years ago. Ah the 70s, a simple time when all the drugs made people too euphoric to criticise what each other was wearing.



If only Sean Connery had stayed on being James Bond for a little longer, then the world today would be a much less complicated place.

12 Comments:

At 2:21 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

brilliant!

 
At 3:01 AM, Blogger Crazy Like A Fox said...

Sean Connery is scaring me.

 
At 3:52 AM, Anonymous Cordelia said...

Thanks a lot!!! You've singlehandedly changed my perception of Sean Connery forever.

 
At 10:18 AM, Blogger lancerlord said...

Darna looks formidable. Power!

 
At 10:40 AM, Blogger Burnt Karma said...

That's a great pic of Sean Connery's lunch box.

And Darna's tissue paper - does it double as a veil when she's in Muslim countries?

 
At 11:51 AM, Blogger A.Ball.of.Yarn said...

Darna's "tissue paper" looks ridiculous!

 
At 7:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cruel, nasty Spiritfingers! Showing such a lovely pic of Jennifer Garner... and then...that. Shudder!

- Desci

 
At 1:20 AM, Blogger Ah 9 said...

they should hire Darna at foodcourts...hehehe

 
At 4:31 AM, Blogger jinnderella said...

i don't think that is tissue paper....isn't it a bleached swath of horse tail? Perhaps a subconcious reference to the horse tails medieval japanese warriors wore on the helms of their armor?

 
At 9:13 AM, Anonymous swanker said...

She can rescue me anytime!

 
At 10:09 AM, Blogger David said...

"The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds." - Zardoz

 
At 10:42 PM, Anonymous JoeB said...

Damn! I thought I'd get to be the first to get in a "Zardoz" reference...

 

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