Wednesday, June 15

Father's Day gift list



What to get a father who has everything including naff pyjamas? They're a tough crowd these Dads, because not many of them are chocolate & flowers type of guys. Not to worry, I've got every type of Dad covered here in this list.

Carnivore Dad
Dad can have fun grilling his herd of animals with these fantastic Steak Brands.

Partial to Skinny Rich Blondes Dad
Paris Hilton won't stop until her musky essence is splashed over the entire world's population, including your Dad - Paris Hilton for Men cologne, who knew something so expensive could smell so cheap.

Gullible Dad
You might know how to use Dad's credit card safely, but he might not. Teach Dad a lesson about protecting his personal information online by sending him an Federal Trade Commission Father's Day card.

Chain-smoking tobacco-chewing Dad
Suck up the noxious fumes, this is one day where he gets to validate his pack a day habit.

Stainless Steel Dad
Put the feeling of cold hard steel in Dad's back pocket. Enough gadgetry to Macgyver out of any situation.

Pauper Dad
Don't just slip Dad a couple of bills to tie him over till next month, give him an entire sheet of uncut greenbacks

Executive Dad
With the Gentlemen's ball scratcher and abusive stamps, Dad can leave the stress of corporate serfdom at the office instead of taking it out on the family.

Staunch gambling Dad
Catholic doctrine playing cards - for the Dad who will clip you behind the ear for cussing but will take you along to gambling halls to keep a lookout for the police.

Syncopated Dad
There are ties and then there's the washboard tie based on a traditional Creole accordion-based musical genre. Oh there'll be lots of dancing and gumbo with this tie around.

As a last resort you can always do what they do in Germany - give Dad the gift of certainty that you are the fruit of his loins. This year, Tri-State families are in luck. Come on then, don't just take Mum's word for it!

4 Comments:

At 4:09 AM, Blogger Jon said...

I'm not a dad and I'll take the abusive stamps for myself :D

 
At 11:05 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The ball scratcher is a classic!

LBYB

 
At 11:14 AM, Anonymous naridu said...

stainless steel....classtastic! The washboard ties are mine.

 
At 3:56 AM, Blogger Neal Hoffman said...

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