Of dirndls and panties
I've got a good feeling about Germany's fortunes at this year's World Cup. Even if they don't win, think about all the money they'll make from flogging grassy soccer vests and dioramic headbands. Not only that but some canny designers have made the dirndl more athletic, giving the fraulein something to wear while bending it with Ballack.
When they're tired of swishing around their field in their dainty dresses, all they have to do is lean forward and the crowd goes wild.
Of course the Germans will have stiff competition in the form of South Korea, which you may remember are planning to export their
finest cheerleaders. Have you seen how big their balls are?
The Korean merchandising push is quite possibly the most formidable deployment of resources since the 38th parallel was crossed. We're talking brightly coloured underwear with the "Reds LOVE" slogan emblazoned where people are most likely to look.
Like in the real game, wearing your team colours requires skill and it's mostly in the leg action.
While at the same time keeping your shoulders back and chest out.
I believe you can also collect souvenir orangutans to mark the occasion, fresh from the rainforests of Borneo. There's a jersey-clad one for every team and unsurprisingly the French one is prone to drama.
Another blog to visit: Rhiannon in the Great White North - Here in Canada only a lucky few live in igloos