Monday, May 1

Plenty of reason to celebrate

Once again Golden Week is upon us and I must brace myself for the crippling drop in productivity. A three day work week here in Hong Kong, and an entire week off for the hardworking and hard spending folk of mainland China. There's going to be nobody around to writeall those inane office memos that I enjoy so much like the ones setting out the correct use of the pantry refrigerator (apparently harvested organs are a no go).

This year's Golden Week provides an extra special reason to celebrate in the light of the recent news that Chinese women are forcing change and moving up in the world. Believe me there is no greater measure of a nation's progress.

The rise in cup sizes has also led to corresponding improvements in the quality of underwear. These days one only has to go as far as Jinan City to procure the finest gold thread underwear spun by Rumpelstiltskin himself.

Bigger breasts were also a key theme at the invitation only Millionaire Fair in Shanghai. While I've never personally attended a Millionaire Fair, I've often imagined that it would be a very upscale affair, with gilded carousels, livestock branded with designer logos and a name dropping fortune teller holding a degree in wealth management. At this particular fair, instead of a pony, rich people were treated to a rare display of Jordan in the flesh.

See China is not as closed to the outside world as you would think! Someone on the inside obviously had access to British tabloids and thought it would be a fabulous idea to bring her over and let everyone see what standards Chinese women should aspire to.

Meanwhile the people of Cyprus were waking up to what they thought was just the aftermath of yet another bachelor party involving the military and a billy goat, but was actually the longest bra chain in the world. There was much crying and gnashing of teeth among the Singaporeans upon hearing their previous record was broken but whaddya do? For every bra you collect, there's always some guy in a trenchcoat out there who has a dozen more stashed in his briefcase.

Once the Filipinos learn to lactate en masse, we can also expect a breastfeeding record to be broken in the coming week. Ladies, we live in history-making times and what better way to commemorate them by going out and getting a new set. Remember the only way forward is to bowl everyone else over.

Another blog to visit: Kitchen Wench - feeding her friends, one recipe at a time!


At 7:11 PM, Blogger surtr said...

what's the deal with the goat between the two military guys in the photograph?

it's like some kind of weird porn that's getting me hot. I think the incessant pictures of half naked women have burnt out my libido centre.

At 10:50 PM, Anonymous Ellie said...

Oh god, the breasts, they just keep reaching higher and higher. Hey, who said silicone never aspires to greater heights?

You just need to make sure you don't end up choking on them *boggles last photo*. Bra? She needs a leash!

At 2:08 PM, Anonymous Todd said...

These girls are so very beautiful. You always have beautiful girls and other things on your site. Love it.


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