In which Pooh has the awesomest birthday party ever

Congratulations Pooh Bear! I don't know what you did to earn a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame but then again Godzilla and Kermit the Frog managed to achieve the same honour and I haven't seen them in anything decent for ages. Not to mention the last time Godzilla appeared on the big screen, he was severely outacted and outclassed by Jean Reno!



It was also good of Pooh's good buddies to come out and support him (all except Piglet that is, who had stormed off in a huff after finding out that Pooh would be in the centre of every photo) because this is probably the only time they'll get close to a red carpet. Personally I think Eeyore deserves props for delivering such a brilliantly understated and unrestrained performance throughout the series but unfortunately the personal life of a morose donkey doesn't generate enough heat to warrant tabloid coverage.

The dedication ceremony coincided with Pooh's 80th birthday meaning there was lots to celebrate. Once they reached the birthday venue Pooh and his friends clambered out of their itchy polyester costumes and that's when the party really got started.


Suddenly it all made sense. Why there's a redwood forest in the Playboy Mansion, why they're called HEFFalumps, why Pooh always has three companions, what Pooh really means when says "Oh, stuff and fluff", why that apology letter to Jessica Alba (star of Honey) took so long to write and was punctuated with lots of "Oh bothers".....


I gotta say that Tigger sure knows how to bounce out of a cake. But the best birthday present of all was the news that the wise and gentle Christopher Robin would be replaced with a girl for the next animated series. Even through the depths of 80-year-old brain fog, Pooh had a very clear idea of which girl he wanted share in his unusual adventures in the enchanted part of the forest.