Wednesday, May 17

Tulips and pansies oh my

Yes, it's that time of the year again. When flowers blossom forth from the soil to make fetching head adornments for those of us don't suffer from pollen allergies. If you can turn up the pretty with just a fresh flower in your hair, imagine what a sizeable chunk of your neighbour's prizewinning garden can do.

Took me several seconds to realise it was a ten gallon hat instead of a floral rendition of one of those cars in the "Italian Job". Wearing it will make you cut an imposing figure as you mosey on through the saloon doors, until of course you slowly remove it and ask the bartender "Could you put these in some water?"

What a unique bouquet arrangement! It manages to say "Happy Birthday", "Get out of rehab soon", "Pregnant, again?", "With deepest sympathy that thieves stole your $100,000 Christian Dior Mother's Day basket" and "Congratulations on your prenup!" all at once.

Seriously, a flesh coloured hat and a white thick cottage-cheese like substance? All signs point to a yeast infection. Never mind, when you're done with decorating your head quite tastelessly, don't be afraid to show off the blooms elsewhere as well.

And if you think you're way way too rough and coarse to wear these precious blossoms, think again! You'll find that they elegantly wrap around one's precise body proportions even when they're not trying to devour you.

Well it beats having parasitic head lice instead. Be assured, this is no garden variety grasshopper. By following the tug of its sensory feelers, it will lead you to likeminded individuals. Just don't be surprised if it turns out to be a stick insect in gigantic rollers:

Another blog to visit: La Revista del Corazón - Disfruta con los cotilleos y las noticias de las revistas del corazón, de la prensa rosa y famosos.


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