The beginning of the end

I tell ya, it's not right what they're doing to Japan. The country has more than enough teenybopper idols of its own to worry about faded popstars from the West. And yet the Tokyo subway has been turned into an underground shrine to naked Britney. I don't know how they're planning to sway commuters with this latest piece of in-your-face advertising. After all Britney doesn't have much in common with the average Japanese woman apart from:

1. Dark hair
2. Their husbands can't rap



Possibly overcome by a newfound respect for Britney after she refused to allow Jessica Simpson to kiss her pregnant stomach, the authorities backed down on their demands for censorship. Korea would never have let that happen. They would have kept her clothed at all times even if it meant defiling their national costume.


That's not to say that the Japanese national costume hasn't been despoiled already. That honour has been reserved for Paris Hilton who manages to make it look like post-coital origami folded by her man-hands.


To Paris, Japan is more than a place where she can successfully market substandard handbags and jewellery. It has become her island of Moreau Horrors where she's been given full reign to design people.


I fear that this is the beginning of the end of Japanese culture. From here on the dross of Western pop culture will usurp itself upon Japan, making the population forget about the simple pleasures of green tea, cherry blossom picnics and violent anime. This sort of thing can't be good for the children.


Next update: Friday 1 September