Thank you for flying the boorish skies

Other ways in which you can disrupt a flight with Gucci designer items


Train your baby to wail nonstop if the baby bassinet is not lined with the signature GG monogram in beige jacquard


Leave your sunglasses on the entire flight and demand that something be done about the appalling video quality of the inflight entertainment


Smuggle a beer keg inside your duffel bag to use as an excuse for your anti-Semitic slurs and derogatory remarks about the female flight attendants


Open the overhead compartment where your pearl python hobo is stored and scream in mock horror "There's a snake on the plane!"


Delay the drinks trolley service until your ice cubes are ready.


Explain to passengers sitting near you that like Thor's magic belt, yours also endows you with magnificent strength. Then try to prove it by opening the pressurised cabin doors with your bare hands.


Help prevent deep-vein thrombosis by loudly whooping and riding your limited edition chocolate leather pony down the aisle.


Grossly exceed the maximum carry-on allowance.

Next update: Friday August 4