Monday, September 4

Dressage has everything to do with clothing

Lifestyle health and safety alert! Well-to-do people have been falling off horses lately, mainly because they haven't been taking the necessary precautions to manage risk and create a friendly horsey environment for all. When a horse kicks up a ruckus, it's no accident - often times it is merely voicing displeasure at your fashion choices. A few simple tweaks to your equestrian attire can tame even the most sullen of beasts.


Some horses have deep-seated issues and desires dating back to their days as foals in repressed boarding schools. They make a big show of being unruly because they enjoy being disciplined, but only if a sexy headmistress is involved.


Protective gear is a must unless Humpty Dumpty is your role model. Wrap the riding helmet in swathes of jersey cloth to prevent dislodgement. The body must also be bound tightly by a large bandage to minimise breasts and other swelling.


If you watched the movies National Velvet and International Velvet, you will know that the star in each instance was the fabric, not the horse or its rider. Wear this and swish-clop swish-clop your way to victory.


Long loose flowing gowns are probably the safest thing you can wear for horse riding. Most times you will get tangled up so tightly with the tack, you'll stay on no matter how bumpy the ride.


Horses can sense when they are carrying someone whose sentiments are less than patriotic. Fortunately, thanks to blinkers they are oblivious to pants that are too tight and boots that are too tacky.


With proper wardrobe planning, it is possible for heavily pregnant women to enjoy an exhilarating horseback experience. Remember to shield your delicate condition well otherwise you'll only end up spooking the horse.

Next update: Wednesday 6 September

2 Comments:

At 4:02 AM, Blogger Ithaca Night Life, NY said...

Hello,

This is the area in which I am asking questions and looking for answers. Among which is a general consensus too !

So in preparation is this...


Hello,

Fashions and recents trends have indicated there is now real debate. No this is not being done in a classical sense within an academic setting. This one is being addressed on the runways a various other walkways of fashion shows in which beautiful models parades with the language of style, and the image they convery dressed on their lovely forms.

Top nudity has now appeared, and with more frequency, and with more open areas of the pelvis regions are now coming in to their own, along with their established sales nitches. This coupled with a new but nervous era of post-feminism one has to really have to look at what this entails to both womyns options and sociocultural safety.

Retros are now becoming stronger too! And thus one also has to ask .." why during this time and era ?" Is this a defensive retreat, or one in which this too is to preserve womyn's options? All the while the fashion style middle of these two extremes the center is likewise being influenced by both directions.

All this during a time in which womyn options and freedoms are rapid'ly increasing too. No longer being held back by any of the past taboos, the lessening of sexual violence, or even for that fact by physical - sexual related limitiations either.

Thus this is sent to initiate a focus in which to trigger discussions so everyone, especically men, can begin to know whats on the future horizons as a result. Is there another human frontier to be conquered ? Or are we maturing as a speicies ?

Roger Meredith Christian
http://asian-quest.tripod.com/fashions

 
At 7:48 AM, Anonymous The Black Horse said...

Great fashions - color and proper scent are very important to horses; they like tight clothing. Too much fabric will protect me but terrify my horse. What to do? Fashion quandry?!!!

 

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