Anchors away, as I depart for a brief sojourn in Macau. Trust me, there's nothing dirty about this weekend except the looks I'll be giving anyone who tries to sell me substandard Portuguese egg tarts.
There are a couple of things that I'll be taking with me:
My distaste for wallets was previously documented here. Worrying about one's worldly possessions is no way to spend a vacation. It's all about relaxing over some quiet drinks followed by dinner, drinks, dancing, drinks, much falling down and yet more drinks.
However there's plenty of gambling to be done, and I'll need somewhere to keep all the money when I break the bank. This is where a marvellous thing called The Cuff comes in handy. It's a bracelet! It's a wallet! It holds cash, credit or in my case, cheap green plastic chips that don't get accepted at the high rollers table! It's a sexy self defence product you can ram into someone's face, leaving a distinctive imprint (much like the Phantom and his sexy skull ring)!
When it opened last year, the Sands casino promised to bring a little bit of Las Vegas into Macau. So far it's only succeeded in bringing:
Dirty Dancing - Hong Kong nights. Nobody puts Baby in badly accessorised armwear.
A group called the Fallen Angels who were cast out of heaven for the twin follies of shimmery eyeshadow and nasty PVC.
Therefore it's up to ME to bring the much needed Las Vegas glitz in the form of I Love Liberace. The dullish grey sands of Hac Sa beach will certainly gay up at the sight of me in a string bikini and my Liberace in Hot Pants beach towel.
And look, our feathery bits work well together:
King Neptune Bag
Joyce Chen, entertainment highlight for April 2005
The only big difference is that Joyce got hers down in Fraggle Rock.