I found these behind the dryer

You're embarrassed because your 61 year old husband dresses like an old man? Cathy, if I had to sleep in the same bed with him every night the last thing I would be complaining about are his socks. I'd complain about we need more nannies for the kids, or how it's getting increasingly difficult to tell my husband and father-in-law apart. But not about the socks.

Which reminds me, it's time to start thinking about what socks to buy as Xmas presents. They are handy gifts for distant relatives who you don't care a great deal for but care enough to want to be a beneficiary of whatever fortune they may acquire. This year we are fortunate to have Throx Socks which come in threes, in case one of them goes awol. Use it to store your stash or wear it like how Jake, the more attractive Gyllenhaal, wears a Santa hat in Jarhead.



Throx socks are also available at Sock Dreams where you can also find a sock blog and delightfully named items like Moo-toes and pom pom garters. Get them before socks as we know them become redundant.



I say this because there appears to be some kind of restructuring going on in the fashion world. It's like upper management decided that socks are no longer viable on their own and need to be streamlined with other items of apparel to improve efficiency. The operational result can be seen in Emma Hope's sock boots.


Can't say I love them. Can't say I like them. Can't even say I can stand to be in the same room as them. Over at Thirteendenim (www.thirteendenim.com) socks have been seamlessly integrated with denim to form jeans that are easily tuckable into tall boots.



Which begs the question. Why would you wear pants with tall boots anyway?
(Upgraded from a picture of Jordan to Madonna)



Another blog to visit: Appearances are Everything - A blog for fashion, skincare, and what celebrities look like.

Like a Bai Ling

Gosh, I'm so excited. It's all coming together beautifully.

The mascot is going to be unveiled later this month. There will be a unified team from North and South Korea. The traditional sport of wushu will be included as an exhibit sport although the Chinese media seems to favour the non-traditional sport of mudwrestling. Zhang Yimou is on board to direct the opening ceremony, a good choice because he is the man to go to when you have loads of colourful fabric but don't know what to do with it.

At this early stage, it's shaping up to be a pretty good Games. But many of us are counting on it to be the best games EVER. Even better than Athens. Even better than Sydney. Even better than Athens + Sydney + the one where the guy shot the arrow into the thing to light the fire. That's where Bai Ling comes in.



What could she contribute to the opening ceremony, you ask? There seems little scope for a 5-minute segment where she stands around dressed inappropriately while blithely posing for pictures. While she has scored many bit parts in movies, I used to think her talents were limited to showing off body parts in men's magazines, body parts that we were all already too familiar with. Then I heard her sing "Like a Virgin (Owwwww)" and I knew that this was an opportunity the Beijing Olympic Committee couldn't pass up.



Has anyone in China even seen this yet? Can we get special permission to crack open the Great Firewall for this one site? After all, Bai Ling did start off as an entertainer for the People's Liberation Army, before she was kicked out for using tobacco and alchol.



There's also the small matter of her Chinese passport being revoked because of her acting choices. Come on now, she was young and naive. Everyone makes mistakes when they're starting out in Hollywood. How was she to know that Richard Gere wasn't as big of a box office draw as he was in the 1980s? Let her back in so she can wow the masses in 2008 with a stirring national anthem/Madonna's greatest hits medley. As a gesture of international goodwill, she'll even remove her skirt on stage.



Another blog to visit: Altar Bound - Follow us on our adventures down the aisle!

Pageant Pageant Eeverywhere

I used to think that beauty pageants were a dying art form. Nobody seemed that interested in watching them anymore and I even removed "botoxed pageant judge" from my mental list of life goals. Then I moved to Asia and there's one here every week! The regularity of chicks on parade has given me a renewed appreciation for beauty pageants. I have also come to realise that they encapsulate the two most important things about being a woman - bikini waxes and wearing high heels.

Recognising that beauty can achieve things which plainness will never be able to (like getting out of speeding tickets and other minor inconveniences), Carousel Entertainment decided to use beauty queens as a means of promoting the environment. The result is Miss Earth, which is really only what's left after "Universe" and "World" has been taken, because then you get into unwieldy words and phrases like globe, terrestrial sphere and terra firma.



The event was held a couple of weeks ago but it will be screened on Star Asia on November 18. Asian viewers can watch not only Miss Earth being crowned (she's the one with the tallest tiara and the biggest smirk) but Miss Air, Miss Fire and Miss Water. Together they will travel the world Loving, Caring, Working, Sharing, Teaching, Singing, Mothering!

Although she did not win an elemental title, special mention must go to Miss Russia for raising the awareness of wearing proper support undergarments during the long gown competition.



Around the same time, the Miss International Queen contest for transvestites and transgenders was held in Thailand. Not sure of what to expect, I thought I would still be able to detect some residual manliness. How wrong I was.




Never again will I doubt the two most important things about beauty - makeup and cosmetic surgery. This year's winner is Miss USA, a result that the US would not have achieved, had it chosen to send Hilary Duff's "sister" instead. It's interesting to note that this is only the second year that Thailand has hosted this contest, considering how prevalent transvestites are in Thai society. In some countries, this type of event has been going on for years.



Another blog to visit: I want - I got - I want this, I want that. I bought this, I bought that.

It takes diff'rent strokes to move the world

How was your Halloween dear readers? Did you take the kids out trick-or-treating? Or did you just wait at home for the creatures to come for your candy and lifeblood? It's always interesting to see how different places celebrate the same festival in different ways.

In Hong Kong, adults tried to educate children about avian flu by waging a scare campaign.


Meanwhile in Manila, someone let their daughter go out dressed like Darna, proving that fashionwise at least, superheroes can be just as crappy role models as Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera.


Japan did not disappoint, showing us that the next generation of cosplayers are carefully being groomed.


Palestine also got into the swing of things, although pink bunny mask boy felt slightly underdressed.


In Las Vegas, there were no children to be seen. Just men and their open agendas.


Over in California, the governor assured his bee-costumed friend that whatever he was pointing at, "it's not a tumaa!"


Zoo animals in Sydney sought to break the monotony of zoo life by making fang-carved pumpkins.


However in the Hilton household, it was merely business as usual.


Another blog to visit: Andrea Arbour: Journal - I prefer spearmint to peppermint.

Fashion Roadkill of the Day: Vol 40

Ever found yourself putting on pyjama pants and shoes that clash, maybe even a crop top and thinking that something's not quite right? It's sheer madness, you say! Sheer..sheer..sheer..why yes, how could you have forgotten the transparent little black dress? Tasteful yet tantalising. I wanna reach you, touch you, capture you, SEXY is the wo-ord!



Even the senior citizens are affording us glimpses of their flesh through the power of semi-sheer pants. Hubba hubba, Grandma! Respecting the elderly now extends to wolf whistling and commenting on their fine set of pins.



What about going seethrough for work? You know, people often hem and haw over this one. Most companies are accepting of opaque but establishing rules over diaphaniety can get tricky. Where do you draw the lines between semi-opaque, sub-translucent and sub-opaque with weakly translucent areas? Lucky for this lady, her workplace's dress policy is extremely clear. Extremely.

Because I love this picture so much

Rick Salomon, Deryck Whibley, Edward Furlong
Jason Shaw, Oscar de la Hoya, Nick Carter
Brandon Davis, Simon Rex, Brian Urlacher

Vincent Gallo, Robert "Millsy" Mills, Tom Sizemore,
Mark Philippoussis, Colin Farrell, Fred Durst too
Sting's son, what about those Greeks Paris and Stavros,

We didn't start the fire
It was always burning
Since the world's been turning
No we didn't light it
But we tried to fight it